The term focusing on one’s flaws is nowadays commonly understood to mean finding fault with others — but this is not its true meaning. Its full and original meaning is this: to set the mind in a state of loving…
In certain countries, the people are genuinely committed to observing rules and regulations with great diligence. How have they trained their people to be this way? It is this: beyond observing the rules and regulations themselves, when they see others…
The Lord Buddha gave this admonition to the bhikkhus: if anyone were to speak critically — whether of the Lord Buddha Himself, of oneself, or of the community — His counsel was this: do not be hasty in anger. Instead,…
The elders and venerable ones have offered this reflection as a reminder for the cultivation of mindfulness: “When dwelling alone, guard well your thoughts; when dwelling among companions, guard well your words.” Even speech that is well-intentioned, when offered without…
When a companion comes to admonish us, and we find within ourselves a matter we have likewise been wishing to bring to their attention — let this be firmly held in mind: one must not return counsel for counsel in…
Whenever another comes to admonish us — whether their counsel proves to be well-founded or mistaken, or even when we have committed no wrong yet they have misunderstood our conduct and come to warn us nonetheless — let us look…
By nature, people are disinclined to receive admonishment from others. It is therefore essential, when one intends to offer counsel, to give careful consideration to both the timing and the emotional state of the one to be advised. Before proceeding,…
